Every day, we make decisions; everything we say and do is the outcome of a decision, whether we realise it or not. There is no simple formula for choosing the best option in each situation, big or small. The most you can do is look at it from as many angles as possible before deciding on a plan of action that appears sensible and balanced at the time. It might be difficult to make a significant decision. However, there are some basic steps you can take to make it less frightening, such as determining the worst-case scenario, creating a spreadsheet, and trusting your instincts. Continue reading to discover more about making decisions.
- Knowing Where Your Fear Comes From
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Write about your apprehensions. Journaling about your worries might help you begin to understand them and, as a consequence, make better decisions. Begin by outlining the decision you must make. Describe or make a list of all of your concerns about this option. Allow yourself to express your anxieties without feeling guilty about them.
Start your notebook by asking yourself, “What is the decision I need to make, and what am I scared will happen if I make the incorrect choice?”
2
Make a worst-case scenario list. Take it a step further once you’ve written about the decision you need to make and why you’re afraid to make it. Try to think of the worst-case scenario for each and every option. Pushing your decision to the edge of what may go wrong if everything goes wrong can make the process less scary.
Consider the worst-case scenario of each selection if you need to choose between continuing at your current work full-time or choosing a part-time job to spend more time with your children.
If you choose to retain your full-time work, the worst-case scenario is that you will miss out on critical milestones in your children’s growth and that your children will resent you later in life.
If you retain your part-time work, the worst-case situation is that you won’t be able to pay your expenses on time each month.
Determine if the worst-case scenario is likely to occur. It’s all too easy for us to “catastrophize,” or stretch things out to the worst possible outcome, without stopping to think about it. Consider the worst-case scenario you’ve outlined and what would need to happen to bring you there. Is this a possibility?
3
Think about whether your decision will be lasting. Consider whether the decision is reversible once you’ve considered everything that may go wrong. Most decisions are reversible, so you can rest easy knowing that if you don’t like your choice, you can always change your mind later.
Let’s imagine you decide to work part-time to spend more time with your children. You can alter your decision by seeking for a full-time work if you have difficulties paying your bills.
4
Speak with a family member or a friend. Don’t feel obligated to make a difficult decision on your own. Enlist the assistance of a trustworthy friend or family member to assist you or at the very least listen to your worries. Share the decision’s facts as well as your concerns about what may go wrong. Simply expressing your concerns about the choice may help you feel better, and your friend or family member may be able to provide you with helpful advise and/or soothing words.
You might also talk to someone who isn’t involved in the problem and can give you an unbiased perspective. A therapist may be an excellent resource for this sort of information.
You might also look for individuals who have been in a similar scenario on the internet. You could post your dilemma on an online parenting forum if you were attempting to decide between full-time job and part-time work with more time with your kids. You’ll very certainly hear from folks who have had to make comparable decisions, as well as some who will advise you what they would do in your circumstance.
2. Taking into Account the Decision
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Keep your cool. Emotions, whether happy or bad, might interfere with your capacity to make sensible decisions. When faced with a decision, the first step should always be to remain as cool as possible. If you can’t keep your cool, wait until you can think properly before making a choice. [5]
To help you relax, try taking a few deep breaths. If you have more time, go into a quiet room and do deep breathing techniques for around 10 minutes.
Start by placing one hand on your tummy below your ribcage and the other on your chest to practise deep breathing exercises. When you inhale, your abdomen should expand along with your chest. [6]
Slowly inhale through your nose. Aim for a 4-count inhalation. Concentrate on the sensation of breathing as your lungs expand.
For 1-2 seconds, hold your breath.
Release the breath slowly and gently via your nose or mouth. Aim for a 4-count exhalation.
For 10 minutes, repeat this method 6-10 times every minute.
2
Gather as much data as possible. When you have enough knowledge to make an educated decision, you can make better judgments. Logic should be used while making judgments, especially when dealing with critical issues. Do some study to learn as much as possible about your choice. [7]
For example, if you were deciding between retaining a full-time work and transitioning to a part-time job so you could spend more time with your children, you’d need to know how much money you’d be losing each month if you made the switch. You should also think about how much time you would gain with your children. Make a note of this information, as well as any other pertinent details that may assist you in making your decision. [8]
You’d have to think about alternative choices and obtain information about them as well. For example, you may inquire with your boss about the possibility of telecommuting at least a few days every week.
3
To comprehend the situation, use the “five whys” method. Asking yourself “why?” five times can help you figure out what’s causing an issue and if you’re making the appropriate option. [9] For example, if you were deciding between continuing your full-time career and switching to a part-time job so you could spend more time with your family, your five whys may be as follows:
“I’m thinking about part-time job because I never see my kids.” “How come I never see my children?” Because I work most evenings late. “What makes me stay up so late most nights?” We have a new account that is consuming a lot of my time. “How come it consumes so much of my time?” Because I am attempting to perform a decent job and, as a consequence, hopefully get promoted. “Can you tell me why you want to get promoted?” To improve my financial situation and provide for my family.
The five whys in this situation indicate that you are considering cutting your hours despite your desire for a promotion. There is a disagreement here that has to be investigated more before a fair choice can be made.
The five whys also point to the possibility that this issue is only temporary: you are working so hard because you have a new account. Consider this: once you’ve gotten used to your new job, will your hours stay the same?
4
Consider who is impacted. First and foremost, think about how your decision will effect you. What impact does your decision have on how you see yourself as a person? What are your core values and objectives? Making decisions that are not “value-congruent” (that is, decisions that are in line with your underlying convictions) might leave you feeling sad and unsatisfied. [10] [11]
5
Make a list of all of your choices. It may appear at first glance that there is just one option, but this is rarely the case. Make a list of possibilities, even if your circumstance appears to be constrained. Do not attempt to analyse them until you have a complete list. Be meticulous. If you’re having problems coming up with ideas, talk to some relatives or friends. [12]
